Okay so I’m 19 years old making me a teen mum as such but not necessarily a teen mum in the sense many will think. The MTV show teen mom and sixteen and pregnant are shows that look into the lives of 16 year olds who are pregnant and then follows some of them for the first few years of their baby’s lives. I am not out for controversy here just think many people are quite narrow minded about how mature some teenagers can be. Instead of referring to myself as a teen mum I think I would rather be a young mum. I lived away from home for a year whilst doing my first year of university and have a clear direction of where I want my life to go. I am capable of looking after myself and definitely proved I am capable of looking after Amelia. It has not been easy and getting past the fear of what others are thinking when they see a young mum was probably the hardest.
I will be the first to admit I loved watching teen mom and programmes just like that but I think until I got pregnant my own mindset on younger parents was that of what people probably think when they look at me. My health visitor was the one who gave me the biggest inside when I was telling her I was worried about what people think of me and she said do you know what people are so busy with their own lives that they don’t really care and probably aren’t looking at you thinking what’s your story why have you got a baby. This gave me the confidence to go to under1s club and baby groups where all the mums no matter what age are absolutely lovely.
I can admit some younger mums maybe aren’t ready to have children and could do a better job if they were a bit older but I’m so happy having Amelia now and being my age. I can take opportunities and be fully involved with her life. I’m not in a career yet and going back to university part time will still mean I will have tonnes of time with Amelia for her first few years of life. And then when she starts school at age four hopefully I will have graduated by then and be able to get a job. It’s almost perfect timing that we will be starting the next step of our lives together.
I think people need to get past the prejudice of young mums. I appreciate that there are some stories that don’t help ‘us’ younger parents but most of us are doing a really good job whilst facing the wandering eyes of some naive people. Being a young mum myself has given me a new respect for those younger mums out there especially those doing it alone for a vast majority of reasons. It is difficult because I’m at a different stage in my life to my friends but they’ve been so supportive. I don’t think you realise or can understand young mums until you are one or are in contact with one. We can be more grown up and ready to be a mum than some older parents out there.
My life has changed but not stopped since having Amelia. I’ve never been so busy and I can’t wait to get even busier as she gets older. I can’t think that I would be doing much different than what I am if I was ten, fifteen, twenty years older than I am now. Maybe I would feel ‘ready’ or ‘more grown up’ but really I think that’s rubbish.
Right here, right now I am the perfect age to be the mum I want to be.